Tag Archives | goals with soul

Feeling Fulfilled: When Desire Takes Over

Feeling Fulfilled: When Desire Takes Over ~ The Attitude Revolution

It’s hard to believe it was only one year ago when I sat down with Danielle LaPorte’s revolutionary Desire Map.

Back then I nailed my five ‘Core Desired Feelings’ as Wholehearted, Vital, Insightful, Lupine, and Wildly Sensuous.

These words plastered my studio, were scribbled in journals, and became the source of a wonderful Pinterest board.

I navigated most of the year using these feelings as my compass. I tried my hardest to align my actions with them so I was moving from my core.

But it is with a heavy heart that I admit my ego took centre stage.

You may have read my deep dark secret in my interview with Naomi Goodlet last week. If not, in a nutshell, the end of 2013 was governed by fear, pressure and overwhelm.

The year was then eclipsed by a break up with my partner of 12 years. Overtaken as I was by heartbreak and pain, I was also fortunate to be surrounded by incredibly wise and loving friends and family.

Their advice for getting through the day?

Do the things that make you feel good.

This was my time to really walk my talk. To put into practice everything I’ve been preaching for the last two years. Gratitude, presence, feeling ALL the feelings.

I realised the the things that made me feel good were the simple, mindful pleasures in life.

Meditating, composing music, journaling, reading Tarot cards, spending time with people who love me, being in nature, yoga. For the first few weeks, this was about all I could manage.

Now that I’ve recalibrated, I am EVEN MORE COMMITTED to the phenomenal power of desire.

As DLP herself says,

‘Knowing how you want to feel is the most potent form of clarity you can have’.

Core Desired Feelings are not the fleeting emotions that erupt through your central nervous system umpteen times a minute. These are the enduring moods that you crave. The feelings that you settle into and make you feel like home.

Now, I know Buddha said that the root of all suffering is desire. And I’m certainly not advocating for ignoring painful feelings or repressing negative emotions. As my shero Brené Brown says - ‘You can’t selectively numb’.


However, I’ve found that when I put feeling good at the top of my to-do list - life flows so much better. I’m more resilient, I’m kinder, more present and fun. I have energy, inspiration, and connection. I eat better, sleep better and do better.

My 2014 Core Desired Feelings

I’ll be honest. I didn’t do the full Desire Map process this time around.

I let words come to me.

At first I thought my CDF’s were: Honour, Communion, Quality, and Wildly Sensuous.

However - a powerful process during a mastermind retreat with my soul sisters was to throw all of this into disarray.

At the end of The Desire Map, there are a few questions to help you really drill down into the best representative word. But it’s not a huge part of the book. Not really a big deal.

However, when used with a friend - it is a game changer!

These questions are:

What does your CDF sound like? What does it smell like? Look like? Feel like? What is your CDF really all about?

Each of us on the retreat got to spend hours downloading our Core Desired Feelings. We would close our eyes and just talk in streaming consciousness as my beautifully gifted friend Emma wrote everything down tirelessly.

Immediately it became apparent when words didn’t sit right or even fit at all. You know your Core Desired Feeling isn’t ‘Honour’ when it smells like boot polish!

So what came out of this approach?

Three glorious Core Desired Feelings that feel like a sigh of bliss.


Mine are:

Wildly Sensuous

What’s been really fascinating to see - especially as I create visual sumptuousness via the Pinterest boards (click each word to view) - is that each feeling seems to be distilled from my original five.

There is a blurring of sensations that somehow seemed honed with just one word. Feelings of Vital + Insightful often = Zen. Feelings of Lupine are easily absorbed by Samadhi.

What is this Samadhi, you ask?

Well - this is where the process became REALLY interesting.

For me, Samadhi began as a bodily sensation. An almost indescribable feeling. I had no word for it, I only knew how it felt.

So I asked my sisters for guidance. And as I described this feeling of ecstatic power and presence, my girl Carly said “It sounds like Samadhi - the sanskrit word for highest consciousness”.


That was it.

When I googled Samadhi - I found a page by Sri Chinmoy and this was the first thing I read…

Above the toil of life my soul is a bird of fire winging the Infinite.

Nailed. It.

And to give you a glimpse into the deep process we went into to ensure that Samadhi was indeed what I really wanted to feel - here it is:

Samadhi Sounds Like

• Music • Wolves howling • Wind in the trees • Waterfalls • People cheering • Laughter • Crackling of the flame

Samadhi Smells Like

• Freshness • Joy • Sensual pleasure • Groundedness • Not earthy - woody • Rainforest • Fresh water • Warm sensual tones • Ylang ylang • Cinnamon • Vanilla • Bergamot

Samadhi Looks Like

• A shooting star • A comet • An arrow • Focus • Fire - but more like a candle • Steady flame • Full moon • Standing tall - really tall • Silent presence • A really tall woman with a staff in one hand and a wolf by her side - you can feel her power from just one look

Samadhi Feels Like

• Powerful • Energised • Grounded • Straight • Tall • Forward momentum

Samadhi Is Really About

• Everything + Nothing

How I generate Samadhi

The fabulous thing about Core Desired Feelings is that they feel so familiar that it doesn’t take much to generate them.

There’s really no need for grandiose overhauls or transformations.

For me - generating Samadhi is as simple as inhaling ylang ylang oil, meditating, composing new music or spending time with my soul sisters.


I am overjoyed to announce that so far this year - this is how I’m navigating my days. By honouring my Core Desired Feelings and moving from the heart.

And hot diggity daffodil - it feels goooood.


Revolutionary Review: The Desire Map

Happy New Year. Welcome to 2013.

As so many of us take this time to set New Year resolutions, I thought it would be a perfect opportunity to review a program that will turn your goal setting process inside out.

Because I know that you want to a) achieve your goals and resolutions and b) feel damn fine whilst you’re doing it.

Remember, I’ll never recommend something I haven’t enjoyed. Because if something is a drag, I won’t finish it (my life’s too short) and you don’t need to read about it (your life’s too short). The reviews have the same simple format each time – What it is. Why I love it. Why you need it.

What it is:

Desire Mapping is a process of understanding the drivers of your behaviour; how you want to feel when you accomplish something; your “goals with soul”.

The Desire Map isn’t just a physical book (although the book itself is gorgeous and embossed. EMBOSSED!)

The Desire Map an online multimedia program that is the most stunning thing I’ve ever seen in terms of content and design.

There’s interactive worksheets so you can create beautiful posters; there’s audio contemplations, meditations and poems; videos; an audio book; an e-book; a Facebook group; and even playlists of music related to Desire. It goes above and beyond.

And it’s beautifully formed. The combination of sunset colours, white space and sacred geometry is sublime.

Here are my 5 Core Desired Feelings that I discovered during the process of Desire Mapping. This poster was created using the Desire Map app. I also made a Pinterest board to help capture how I want to express those Core Desired Feelings…

Why I love it:

I want to tweet every second sentence. At the end of each paragraph I want to jump up and scream Holla! at the top of my lungs and pump my fist in the air.

Every word, quote and poem within is a life-affirming YES.

When I say it is the Tactical Mood Transformer* on crack, I’m not being facetious. I’m serious. The Desire Map takes a concept that I learned whilst working as Personal Trainer (ie everyone wants to feel good and that’s the basis of their goal) and expands it with a sonic boom.

And I don’t mean that in an egotistical “I totally could have written The Desire Map” kind of way. I mean it in the way like when I hear a piece of music and think “Yes, that’s exactly how I would have composed it” even when the producer is a thousand times more professional than my ilk.

It’s synchronous and comforting. It’s exciting and humbling.

* The Tactical Mood Transformer is a little ebook you can get for FREE by signing up for updates in the box on the right.

Why you need it:

So you can crack open your authentic, delicious, unadulterated desires and feel good. So you can have inspiration on tap, motivation on speed dial, and live your deeply grounded truth.

The Desire Map has self knowledge at it’s core and when you understand exactly how you want to feel and align your actions with it – amazing, divine, jaw-droppingly exciting things happen.

Make no mistake, this process will change your life.

Go now and check out The Desire Map.

What do you most want to feel in 2013? What do you want to stop doing? Have you done your New Year’s resolutions already? I’d love to know. Share in the comments below.

{Full disclosure – the links contained in this review are affiliate links. This means if you click on the link and decide to purchase the book I get a small percentage of the sale – thus helping me to continue running this site.}